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Oh hey there, new tiny human!

Oh how the time flies! I don't even know where to start with all that has happened since the last post.  I've taken several hundred pictures with my phone, so I'll use those to help me remember everything!

I woke up to contractions at 6:30am two days after my due date.  

Just checked in and slightly freaking out! I spent the 17 hours of labour reading and playing games on my Kindle and wishing that I had brought in more food. 

Eleanor was born late on December 21st.  She didn't cry at all-- just opened her eyes and looked around.  Plenty of crying has come since then, though ;)  She was 6lbs 2oz and 19.5" long.

My parents were here for a bit too, which was fun!

Zoe has been pretty great with her!  The first several days she was just super curious and wound up, but she has calmed down a lot and just sniffs and tries to lick her.  I think they'll be extra good friends once Eleanor is throwing food on the ground.

...when there's "no room", she makes room.  Zoe takes advantage of my lap when there isn't a baby in it! 

Right after Christmas Sam's side of the family all came up to visit, too! We had a little baby shower (thanks girls!) and just hung out for a few days. (You guys need to come back! It went by too fast!)

Eleanor will only sleep if you hold her, so we've taken up residence on the couch most of the time.  

She's pretty small still, and even newborn size clothes are a bit baggy.  She's too long for preemie clothes, so she just swims in them a bit.

Here she is making up for not crying when she was born...

Looking glamourous with the carrier wrap. It keeps her happy while I make (futile) attempts to get chores done.

Jennifer also came for a visit!  I got to gather some wisdom from her experience with her own kids. 

Eleanor kept us entertained with her funny faces.

This picture kind of captures the gong show that sometimes occurs in the middle of the night.  Since the newborn pjs were too big, she kept getting her foot stuck in the crotch and choking herself when she kicked-- so here she is screaming, half naked, diaper falling off.  We're so competent!

Another favourite face-- so serious!

We sure love our curious, strong, snuggly, wonderful baby!

Hairy baby!

We're coming in on the homestretch with baby girl!  There are 5 weeks until the due date, which feels pretty unbelievable!  My fundal height was measuring small, so I went in for an extra ultrasound this week.  Great White shark baby is on the small side, but no reason to worry! Both Sam and I were/are small too, and all of the other stats are really good.  It was also fun to see that she already has hair on her head-- I LOVE newborn baby hair! I wasn't surprised, considering how much hair I had:

Sam was pretty hairy too!

Since she's small, I'm wondering if this means that she might come later than the due date in order to grow a bit more.  While I'm obviously excited to meet her, I'm in no hurry, really-- she's safe and cozy in there, and I have soooo much to do still.  We haven't even purchased a car seat yet!  Not to mention that I have a ton of things that I want to sew and crochet for her.  And not to gloat, but I've had a crazy easy pregnancy so far.  I can handle several more weeks.  I just hope that simplicity carries on through delivery and her temperament :)

(People have been asking if we're registered anywhere for baby stuff.  There's a link in the sidebar to the registry list!)

September in Pictures

First day of law school! 

Gross Fabulous bathroom shot after a run.  I get Braxton Hicks contractions on every run now. Very distracting!

Miss Zoe looooves playing in the water!

27 weeks- when my parents came to visit!

Playing with some friends at the new dog park right behind our apartment!

Annnnd please don't judge me, but I was testing out my crochet skills on a dog sweater and hat.  Zoe was a good sport and let us dress her up.  Don't worry, we're not actually going to make her wear it ;)

Mom and Dad White and Anya came to visit, along with Oreo and Bandit.  I was very impressed with how nice Zoe was with the little dogs. She's a bit clumsy and walked right over them a few times-- but she didn't react or flinch at all to getting bit and yapped at. She seriously has the best temperament!

My dogchild.

I was on Skype with my family last week, and I realized how much I was just going on and on about Zoe.  She's like our dogchild.  So I'm sorry if you don't care for dogs, or pets in general, and if my overload of Instagram pictures and status updates about our pooch are just super boring to you!  Hey, if human babies are more your thing, I'm sure there will be a buttload of those coming up, too.

I've been dying to get a dog for a long time.  Having grown up with dogs, I really missed being around them when I went away to university!  The entire time I've lived in Utah I've tried to find dog-friendly apartments, but I never could.  But when we decided to move to Washington, I was pretty thrilled to discover how dog-friendly it is!

Last month it was finally time to pick out a new friend!  I looked online for a few specific dogs that I wanted to meet, and we headed to the animal shelter to take a look around  There we found Zoe-- and boy, am I glad we did!  She makes for great company when Sam is gone all day/working and studying all night.  I feel a lot safer having her here, too.  She loves to come on runs and hikes with me, which is exactly what I have been hoping for!  She can be super goofy when we play (and is a really messy eater!) and a perfect snuggle buddy, too.  Love this dog!  She's a total sweetheart, and a lot of fun!

This is the picture the shelter put online.  That cute tongue stood out to me! She loves the water, but is still learning how to swim when she can't touch the ground!

Such a happy dog! 

She loves to watch people out the window.

We take her swimming at the lake. She plays (and sleeps) hard! She has a lot of dreams when she sleeps- growling, barking, moving her legs like she's running, snoring...

We've had a few thunderstorms, and she likes to watch out the window!  She just plops down in our laps when she gets the chance! Doesn't mind thunder... But scared of garbage bags! 

We've got a kicker!

I've been feeling Great White Shark Baby kicking for just a little over a week now, and holy smokes, this kid is active! I first felt it when I poked my stomach to see if GWSB would poke back, and they did!  If I have my laptop on my lap, I'm leaning against the counter, or leaning forward in my chair, GWSB gets especially aggressive and gives a bunch of jabs to get some space back.  There's also some activity throughout the day and when I first get in bed. It feels kind of creepy, but I love it.

In case anyone is wondering, I call it GWSB because fetuses look like baby sharks early on, and I really dislike the usual fetus nicknames.  Shark baby is way cooler.

Today I had the first Dr. appointment up here in Washington, and once again, it was a little hard to get a good heart rate reading because GWSB would start kicking the doppler and swimming away whenever we got close. Then later today I got to go back for an anatomy scan (FINALLY!).  It was so weird to both feel and see the kicking, punching,  and stretching (and flipping off)!  We got to see a 3D image, too-- of the face smushed as far into a corner as it would go.  Silly baby.  Everything looks great physically (thankfully!) and I'm measuring right on schedule for December 19th still.  Halfway there!

Patience and Timing

I'm not a very patient person, while Sam is extremely patient.  It's almost agonizing for me sometimes when he is so easy-going, while I'm hardly able to sit still.  He's more about letting things come naturally, while if I want something, I go do it myself now- and not always when the timing is best :) Our differences make us stronger together, since we end up balancing each other out! He helps me slow down a bit, while I give him a kick in the pants once in a while!

Sam and I started trying to have kids a long time ago-- while I was still finishing up school.  It was exciting, and I kind of assumed that it would just happen right away.  This was because we had both felt a confirmation that it was the next step for us.  It was the right thing to do.

Months passed with nothing happening.  No worries-- it can take up to a year for a healthy couple to conceive.  When nine months hit, I  couldn't help but think about how I would have had a baby already if it had just happened right away.  At one point I had a cycle that lasted over 90 days (which was over three times longer than it "should" have been), but all urine tests were negative.  Eventually I went to the doctor for a blood test, but a few days later the nurse let me know that it had been negative as well.  What the heck was going on?

One of the hardest aspects of waiting was seeing other people seemingly easily get what I could have had already.  People who had gotten married after we had started trying already had their babies- or were even pregnant with their second!  I felt so guilty for feeling any sort of hurt or jealousy over the fortune of others.  It's not like because they had a baby it was keeping me from having my own.

A year of trying came and went.  I was so confused, because I knew that it was what we were supposed to be doing.  My impatience was getting harder to fight.  My patriarchal blessing makes it clear that I would have children in this life, but now I was wondering if that would need to be many years in the future when we could afford expensive infertility treatment or adoption.  Doubts arose about if I was doing something wrong that was preventing this blessing from coming.  Then I figured it was my fault that it wasn't happening because I was being so impatient, or for other weaknesses I have.  Fortunately, while Sam was also concerned about what might be going on, he was so faithful that things would work out.  He reminded me that the Lord doesn't expect us to be perfect as a precursor for blessings.

People started hinting (not very subtly) that they were "wondering where those babies were" and "what we were waiting for".  Oh, how I wish I had an answer to that myself.  Sometimes I felt like yelling, "you know what, we're doing our best, get off of my back!".  Little did they know how much time I had spent crying, praying, and poring over books and articles.  I don't blame them-- people are just curious-- but I was thinking about "where those babies were" enough myself without being reminded by other people.

I finally got in with my doctor to try to get to the bottom of what was going on.  Long story short, it was because of something physically wrong with me, and he had me start some medication that was likely to help.  If it didn't, we could try more extreme methods.

While in the midst of receiving treatment was when I first started mentioning to people the challenge having a baby was turning out to be.  Mere days later, I finally got that positive pregnancy test!  It felt like how when you're having computer troubles and you complain about it, the second somebody comes to take a look it starts working again.  I swear it wasn't working a minute ago!

Because it took so dang long (in my impatient eyes) to get pregnant in the first place, I've been hyper paranoid about something going wrong.  Every ultrasound makes me anxious, even though there is no real reason to worry at this point.  It still doesn't feel completely real.  I guess I'm just not completely convinced that there's actually going to be a baby around here, come December!  Once it does hit, it will probably be like a ton of (happy) bricks!

While all of this was a struggle, the most important thing that I've been reminded of is that the Lord has a WAY better sense of timing than I do.  I can make all of the plans I want, but He knows what is truly best for my family!  Regardless of what other trials are to come, God knows what will make us the strongest we can be, and the best tools in His hands.